Disappear

I feel like crap. I am still recovering from flu and having crazier mood swings. Often, I have no appetite and have been feeling giddy or light-headed. And I just puked air.

At least twice today I had to get out of the office and take deep breaths. Maybe I am getting anxiety attacks, heart palpitations or something. Concerned boss, GT, suggests maybe I should check my blood pressure.

People are talking about Chinese New Year and I am just dreading it. I am hating the idea of spending it with family. I already have a tough time putting on a mask everywhere I go. I can hardly be myself around people. Sometimes I wonder if I am being a bother to ML with all my crap.

I need to get away. It is times like this, that the whole idea of disappearing sounds more and more appealing. I wish I could do that. Just disappear.

Invalid

A whole years work invalidated because of prejudice.
I am so sick and tired of working for a boss that favours some newbie that is so desperate to prove herself that she refuses to learn from the existing team and instead drives a wedge that divides.

I’m very sure there’s a special place in hell for these people. I have no reason left to do my job. I am out of here.

Expectations

Is it wrong to expect your partner to look after you a bit when you are sick?

When they offer to buy you dinner but come home late and empty handed, and that, sick as you are, you have to cook your own instant noodles for dinner.

I think I treat my friends better when they are sick. And that’s while I’m sick too.

Really on the verge of throwing in the towel here. Now I’m just waiting for the drugs to take its effect on me and sleep.