Category Archives: God



So we just had an appreciation service in church to end of 2013. Honestly, 2013 felt like such a horrible year and I’m just waiting for the end of the festivities in early 2014 to end so that I can move on.

There was a time for everyone to write little notes of appreciation to each other. I couldn’t write anything. I didn’t feel up to it. On top of that, I believe I was suffering from an anxiety attack then. Heart palpitations and all. I just wanted to hang back and fade away.

I just read the notes that people wrote on my sheet. So many of it was for serving on the worship team. If only people knew how sometimes I feel obligated to serve. I feel like I need a break, but I can’t take one because there’s no one else left to do stuff.

I’m like that too much I guess. I go out of my way to do things. Sometimes I wonder if this is what causes me to feel dry. That I do so much for other people that I burn out.

Selfish seems like such a negative word. But I feel I need to be self–ish. I have lost all sense of it really. And though I seem to have strands of it coming back, it’s still not enough for now.


An encouragement from ML…

Faithful Is He Who Has Promised

Are you passing through a testing.
Is your pillow wet with tears?
Do you wonder what the reason,
Why it seems God never hears?

Why it is you have no answer
To your oft-repeated plea,
Why the heaven still is leaden
As you wait on bended knee?

Do you wonder as you suffer,
Whether God does understand,
And if so, why He ignores you,
Fails to hold you in His Hand?

Do black doubts creep in, assail you,
Fears without, and fears within,
Till your brave heart almost falters
And gives way to deadly sin?

All God’s testings have a purpose-
Someday you will see the light.
All He asks is that you trust Him,
Walk by faith and not by sight.

Do not fear when doubts beset you,
Just remember-He is near;
He will never, never leave you,
He will always, always hear.

Faithful is He who has promised,
He will never let you fall,
Daily will the strength be given
Strength for each and strength for all.

He will gladly share pain with you,
He will gladly give you peace.
Till your tired and weary body
Finds its blessed, glad release.

When the darkened veil is lifted,
Then, dear heart, you’ll understand
Why it is you had to suffer,
Why you could not feel His hand

Giving strength when it was needed,
Giving power and peace within
Giving joy thru tears and trial,
Giving victory over sin.

So till then just keep on trusting,
Thru the sunshine and the rain,
Thru the tears and thru the heartaches,
Thru the smiles and thru the pain

Knowing that our Father watches,
Knowing daily strength He’ll give,
Victory for each passing hour,
This is life, so let us live!

By John E. Zoller